Victoria styled it too!!

Victoria styled it too!! by victoria-saidit featuring a black leather belt

H M cardigan
$12 - hm.com

H M jersey top
$6.04 - hm.com

H&M blue skinny jeans
$61 - hm.com

Faux-suede boots
$68 - prettylittlething.com

Black Rivet shoulder bag
wilsonsleather.com

The Giving Keys pendant jewelry
nordstrom.com

BeckSöndergaard black leather belt
$59 - coggles.com

Cateye sunglasses
$11 - brylove.pl

Walk this way!!!

Coming up on fall!!! Pull some of your favorite summer essentials into the next season!!!

Walk this way!!! by victoriasaidit featuring Rip Curl

Rip Curl top
backcountry.com

Brown blazer
choies.com

George J. Love black pants
$110 - yoox.com

Sole Society ankle boots
solesociety.com

Dolce Gabbana canvas purse
marissacollections.com

Ki ele stainless steel jewelry
nordstrom.com

Layered necklace
shopdandylionboutique.com

UCF FRAT NOT WRONG FOR CHANTING "RAPE BI****S"

According to the Huffington Post; A University of Central Florida discipline panel says a fraternity that was suspended over a member's videotaped offensive remarks about rape did not violate university policy.

Thursday's ruling still requires staff approval, and the fraternity will remain suspended until the final decision.

Information from Huffington Post says the Sigma Nu fraternity chanting "RAPE! RAPE!" and other offensive remarks June 9th wasn't enough evidence to convict the student, which no longer attends University of Central Florida.

"Bust that pu**y open, then I tell her bring it back. Make sure you don't fall in love, cuz I don't have the time for that. Only thing I chase is money, if you tell me where its at! When you rich, there is a certain type of woman you attract". 

-Drake (Take you down)

#SayHerName

I've been silent long enough. Personally I experienced some would say depression others call it a break down. I've mentally been fighting and can't hold off any longer. I stepped out of the ring of fire because you have cops following you around, your family is in jeopardy, and your family supports you but fears you won't return home and this may be their last good bye.
I'm done holding my tongue. It's more depressing to not say anything and act as if this world isn't full of shit. We have police officers steady getting off murdering us. Then we have folks that only know retaliation as an answer. So, hell we stay in memorial services and funerals.
The biggest problem I have with this world is the people that speak, that should just shut up. Some people don't understand what's going on, you just take everything face value; as is, and that's that. Like you think a woman can hang herself with a trash bag? What kinda trash bag is that?  And I guess you've never been to jail. No trashcans in jail! You think a cop has the right to pull you out of your car? HOW?!

YOU ARE KIDDING ME IF YOU THINK SANDRA BLAND HUNG HERSELF!

YOU ARE OUT OF YOUR MIND IF THINK ANYTHING A COP DOES, THEY HAVE THE RIGHT TO DO BECAUSE OF A BADGE.

#JusticeOrElse

#BlackLivesMatter

#VictoriaSaidit

5 QUOTES

 I've  discovered that being an adult is the ultimate challenge, then to dig deep I find it is even more of a challenge to be a woman. In addition to being a female and adult... add black to the equation baby. 

Women birth the children with the help of a males sperm, but we carry the child for 9 months in hopes that the child we birth will be healthy, smart, and safe. We hope that this child will listen to us and stay away from the bad people. As a mother, the struggles are real. 

Being black is the icing on the cake. It is 2015 and to be uplifted by society is an up hill battle. No I'm not putting down white women. I'm simply uplifting woman all together that I know without a doubt get only little praise and little encouragement. And no I'm not preaching feminism, but as its been stated, encouragement. Yes when all else fails, quote Drake, but no fails here; be powerful! 

• “Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.” – Maya Angelou
• ‎”When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you.” – African Proverb
• “The triumph can’t be had without the struggle.” – Wilma Rudolph
• “Whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. Because you’ll find that when you’re free . . . your true self comes out.” — Tina Turner
• “There is always something to do. There are hungry people to feed, naked people to clothe, sick people to comfort and make well. And while I don’t expect you to save the world I do think it’s not asking too much for you to love those with whom you sleep, share the happiness of those whom you call friend, engage those among you who are visionary and remove from your life those who offer you depression, despair and disrespect.” – Nikki Giovanni

-Victoria Said It

INSTAGRAM:https://instagram.com/victoriasaidit/

FACEBOOK: https://m.facebook.com/VicSunshine?ref=bookmarks

So I went thrift shopping today. Yes... I love to go thrift shopping and  I came across this thing. Only thing is I don't know what it is exactly. My plan was to use it for my cigarette smokers for their ashtray on my patio, but then I started looking at it and I really want to know what it is!
It's come to my attention that it's way more than an ashtray. Hell my daughter said "it's looks like a thing you keep people's ashes in". LOL! At least I hope it isn't an urn.
This has been on my brain like Kanye, ALL DAY ALL DAY! Help me!

"What up, what up? H Town in this bit*h! What up, what up? Me and Pump about to do it for the city! What up..."
-Drake (What Up)

Don't Bring 'Em Home If They Can't Use Your Comb

This write up has been in the works for a little over a month. This isn't the easiest to write because I personally have so much emotion tied into. People have their opinions, so I decided to write this from another's experience who would be just as passionate in her words about stereotypes and acceptance of her family.
 I got the chance to get some time of my older sister to ask her some questions. Her family is super adorable and guess what? They are just that, a family. Not a black family, not a white family, but a family. There's Chas, Tim, and their son Corbin.
Many black women refuse to date outside the race for a number of reasons. When you see an interracial couple, most people are still very judgemental. Why not talk about the stereotypes, dealing with acceptance, and the experience of interracial dating?

Victoria: Have you heard of the stereotype; white women that date black men are in it for the money?

Chas: I have literally never heard of this stereotype! There's some humor to it because I've known several white women who've dated black men and that never crossed my mind.

This one lady, Cathy, dated nothing but black men, we always joked that she wanted to be black so bad that she would give them HER money. Her last boyfriend Mark took her for all she had and it was such an odd pairing because he, as a black man, seemed border-line racist towards white people.

Another lady, Marlene says that she's only attracted to black me and just can't “see” herself with anyone outside of the black race. It's just her personal preference.

Victoria: In these times now, biracial couples are still being looked at as if love has a definition of what ethnicity is allowed to fall in love. Many say they'd never let their son date a white girl. Some feel it's a diss to the black man for a black woman to date a white man. As society shows us on television, biracial couples are ok, as long as they look like Jason And Kelly Pitts (BET, The Game).
For me personally, it's hard to be prejudice, because my ethnic background is so mixed up, but I love my black people. I love a black man, but if he's not crazy, got a smile, 6'0" or better ,respectful, and he's head over heels for me... I don't care if he's rainbow, sounds like a keeper to me but time and time again when an African American woman is dating outside the race, she's  called a “sellout” and are said to not be“black enough”.

Chas: I'm quite sure that this notion crosses some people's mind when they see Tim and I, along with Corbin. Knowing this does not bother me, only because we've been together for so long. The looks and stares are just not important to me anymore.

Rewind back 8 years ago: I intentionally looked for people who stared at us too long just so that I could 'hardcore' stare right back until they got uncomfortable. I was angry at the shear rudeness of people and this my 'revenge' on them.

Do I think of myself as a sellout? No. Tim was the first/only white guy I ever dated. It wasn't suppose to last. I'm not a sellout because his race was not the reason that I chose to continue my relationship with him.

I think that a sellout is a person who, given a choice would choose the (in this case) white guy of the guy of my own race (black). No, I remain with Tim because he was the first guy to show a desire to be in a long-term relationship with me, he wanted a future with me.

I don't consider myself a sellout because I liked having a boyfriend that loved me, I eventually wanted a future with him NOT a baby with 'good hair'. That would be selling out!

And I am 'black enough' because I love myself. Sure my natural hair gets on my nerves and I haven't gone to Africa to 'search' my ancestry, but how many 'us' have natural hair and have gone to Afric? Just because you stay dating in your race, does not give one “more blackness”. I think that being aware of where our culture came from and where it's headed is being “more black”.

Victoria: Acceptance when racism still exist can be a challenge. You've seen the remake of Guess Who's Coming to Dinnner called Guess Who starring Bernie Mack and Ashton Kutcher, it was just as difficult to have the father of the daughter except this white male, but reality he explained as a father, no one will ever be good enough for his daughter.
Ashton Kutcher's character dealt with his white coworkers and boss accepting his black girlfriend. In the name of love for his girlfriend he quit his job. How has this experience of acceptance been for you all?

Chas: Our families were well aware that if they did not accept us, then they'd lose us! I was under no pressure to remain within the race, and neither was Tim by his parents. When I met some of his other family (cousins uncles etc...) I could tell that there was some discomfort but I knew that it was something on their part. I didn't make anyone uncomfortable; they made themselves uncomfortable. So when I thought of it that way, I was just fine with whatever they thought of me.

In the beginning of our relationship, one of Tim's childhood friends told him that he didn't 'really like black girls'. Tim told him “...she's not for YOU” and their relationship is basically non-existent now.

One of my best friends told me “I don't want you with a white guy!” that really didn't bother me, because I didn't expect it to last that long, but as time went by she realized that she was either going to accept it or lose me. She's still my best friend to this day and she loves Tim with all of her heart. I'm glad that my family loves Tim and I know that Tim's parents, brothers and sister love me just as I do them

It's daunting to have this 'duty' to show people that love truly is blind. I'm at a point with grown ups who can't accept interracial dating that I'm okay with leaving them in their ignorance. Let them swim in it, I'm not getting paid to change their perceptions.

"Take it or Lose me!"
-Chastity Alexis McGraw

The Universe Speaks Loud... but you don't hear it

Sometimes the universe has it's way of speaking to you. It's been a humbling experience down this road. I'm not sure if this is as far as its taking me but I know after my jobless experience, it's been a stressful ride and I only cried like 3 times, which 2 of those were out of anger. The 1 time I think I just needed to relieve some pressure...
By all means,  I'm able to be happy. My spirit is happy. I've lost some people along the way and that's cool. I wish them much peace and maybe in due time when I allow them back in my life, they'll be ready for me... Then again in this humbling experience I can just worry about today. Things I can't change, I won't fight. I'll just let it happen.
You can't change anything, it's easier to know that. Know you're going to do what the universe has in store for you, it's easier to grow like that. In the upmost respect of yourself and the universe, live as free as you can. The universe doesn't have a given time line and we can't hold on to tomorrow, better to live like that.

"I'm turnin' into a nigga that thinks about money and women, like 24/7. That's where my life took me. That's just how shit happened to go"
-Drake (Know yourself)

Cheater Cheater... why?

Do you get into a relationship to be with someone? I thought yes, but the question came up of , why cheat? Are you bored? Is it something you think you're missing? You know that 80/20 rule?
I'll admit, I've been a cheater and been cheated on. I thought cheating and admitting would get me out of a bad situation. Not the case, I felt like I was in a bad movie. Then I questioned, if I cheated and I told you, why torture me mentally? I thought, "You could just break up with me". I later found out that individual did cheat, did he admit it? Nope! He is that type that'll lie to his grave, as long as he never looks like the bad guy.
It's clear the flesh is weak, you become tempted. The individual that cheats can always have an excuse of why they did it. But the real question is, WHY?
As humans we are merely that, human. If you're a biblical type, Eve and the tree is a definite example. Adam is the example of "stop snitching". Lol!!
Seriously , we get into relationships and expect all questions to be answered. We think we'll  find ourselves, but we don't. It's not guaranteed that shit  can be worked out. Maybe, just maybe you're in that relationship that grows, then maybe again... maybe not.
My honest opinion, if you're dating and you cheat... that mf ain't shit. If you're married, realize you got married and in front of God and a whole bunch of people you may or may not like... and in this case in the words of Ol' Otis, "It's cheaper to keeper her"...or him.

"Mad cause he ain't like me. Oh you mad cause nobody ever did it like me. All the care I would take. All the love that we made. Now you're trying to find somebody to replace what I gave to you"
-Drake (Shot for me)

Your Tattoos Make You A Horrible Mother... Really?

Does your INK make you a bad parent? Are you unlikely to have a fantasy wedding with Ink? You have tattoos,  will your child get them too?

12 tattoos and counting, 10 years of raising a beautiful daughter, and I'm still a kick ass parent. Having tattoos as a female, people who don't have them or don't understand the art, can make you feel almost less of a woman/man/parent because of the tattoos. You have those that chose their tattoo position to strategically hide when they wed, but who says you'll get married? In my twenties, I don't see marriage in the near future (too many "I'm not ready" types), but whomever is lucky enough, he'll love the art too. Being a thespian and a student ambassador in undergrad, I mastered how to cover my art with makeup. Should I have to? No, but that was then. Now, if it doesn't put money in my pocket/feed my family, then the INK lives.

One famous parent, Mark Wahlberg in 2012 removed his tattoo of Bob Marley located on his shoulder, in hopes that he will deter his children. Let this be known, neither of my parents, grandparents, or uncles and aunts have tattoos. My oldest brother has one tat. I'm 1 of 5 and I'm the one with the most. Myself and my daughter's father are neck and neck with the number of tattoos. As a young child, Cailyn would take washable markers and say "look I have tattoos like daddy!". Now at 10 they amuse her as art but the pain she's aware of and isn't fond of what all it takes to get at tattoo.

"How many of our parents marriages lasted'. 

-Drake (Fireworks) 

Do you trust... again?

There is always a relationship  (friend, family, significant other) that makes you question your next move. Either they did or said something to put that wall up higher than The Great Wall of China. That person that has known you, can be the one to hurt you the hardest.   

Could giving someone another chance make you become a bigger idiot than them? Many feel trying to be the bigger person can make you mean because you never forget and you're always expecting that idiot to mess up again. 

Yes, one could say I'm contridicting myself when I say " let it go", but I'm sensitive when it comes to the heart. In the words of the late great Maya Angelou, "when someone shows you who they are believe  them, the first time". The heart is sensitive and the brain even more. You have 1 life to live and some people aren't worth being apart of it. Learn the lesson and carry on.

 When do you draw the line? Do you forgive and forget? Are you able to trust a person won't fuck up...again? Or is it instilled in their DNA and incapable of being a friend or loved one?

 "Tell me, how the fuck we supposed to stay friends
When you got a bunch of feelings that you don't show?" -Drake (Trust Issues)

Victoria's Pick Alert: New Online Store

Let's start off by thanking our sponsor today; My Grandma's Basement Resale, "Where the true treasures come from my Grandma's basement." Go check out their amazing site at My-Grandmas-Basement.shopify.com
From this great little online experience, I was able to my favorite product as Victoria's Pick. My Grandma's Basement is just starting up and ready for the spring. She has the cutest jewelry and even dishware. She customized this perfect drinking glass for me. Can't wait to drink responsibly in my Victoria glass.

Strong, educated, determined, and a mother...with no man

Baby momma. Mom. Mother. Mommy. These are all titles I wear well. Being a Mommy and dating can be difficult. You have the kind of men out here that  can either handle it or they are too weak. You know the man I'm talking about, the one that thinks you want him to be your child's father. The one that assumes it's going to be BD/BM (BABY DADDY/BABY MOMMA) drama.
It never fails, true my daughter is my life. I really only trust a handle full of males around her,  which none of them I've ever dated. I love that girl and never regret her. She made me the woman people love to know. Thank her when you see us out because I wouldn't have completed  half of what I have without her.
Being a mom isn't bad, she is my responsibility, and I have a strong support system. If the man I'm dating can't handle that, then I guess it will always be the two of us. If the man that I'm dating thinks he's too accomplished to be with a "baby momma", then I guess it will always be the two of us and OUR accomplishments .  If the guy I'm dating isn't able to comprehend that I make sacrifices for me and my daughter's wellbeing, then I guess its just the two of us. If the guy I'm dating can't accept the responsibility of just being a responsible male role model; not a dad, not step daddy, not a boyfriend, but responsible male... Then I'm happy with it being just me and my Princess... until she finds a man that will respect her... It's just the two of us. I'm a mom. I'm not looking for someone to sponsor us. I'm literally looking for a man that can be in our life without thinking he's better than me if he doesn't have kids or a man that if he has a kid or few, that he takes care of those kids.

RANT: Life

Realize you can't change shit. Thats a given, you can't change people, you can't change a decision you already made, you can't worry about shit. You just have to live. You hold on to shit and it makes you sick. It makes you worse. You become the person you can't be around and wonder why no one wants to be around you.
I've taken a minute off of writing to get a hold on things that I couldn't change. As if was a slave to giving up on what I love to ensure the satisfaction of others. So in my time off, I did the shit I love;I decided to live and do homework. It's only so much you can take of doing for others that don't value you. Sometimes it's healthy to shut out the negative and all the bad vibes, to surround yourself with total peace.

My advice to you is my daughter's favorite phase from the movie FROZEN, "Let it go!"

" You only live once, that's the motto, ni--a Yolo!"
-Drake The Motto

My LIGHT GIRL Experience

After completely watching Light Girls and Dark Girls, I've decided to share my experience. Listening to the women that shared similar stories as mine. "Mellow Yellow!" "White girl!" "Yella bitch!" "You not black!", "your momma or daddy white?" "You too light." "I like you because of your skin color." "You'll win because your light skin." "You dance white!" "You talk white!" Do you know I've heard it all. I was teased and hell, I'm still teased. I never knew how difficult it would be to tell this experience.

Dating while light skin:
In high school I was approached  by a guy who said he gave me a double take because I was  light. Now if you know me, I've been more involved with light skin men and not because I don't like other guys of different complexions. I've just been approached more by those guys. I've had white men tell me, "you're not black but you're cute for whatever you are." Let's not forget the white women that looked at me with these piercing looks because  I was in a club on Wash Ave and a white guy was talking to me and we exchanged numbers... I instantly felt like "that black girl". You're either not black enough or too black.
Recently, I sat down to grab a bite to eat and drink with a good friend that is a white male I've known for about 15 years. We laughed, we hugged, and we enjoyed ourselves. At this Mexican restaurant I was the only black person in there, but I didn't realize until later that I was the only "spook" in there. I assume I was mistaken for being Hispanic because one of the waiters came up and told him I was "trouble". My friend and I continued our conversation about how interracial couples are starred at in all environments, the priveledge versus nonpriveledge, and how complexions are what separate Black Americans. I told him later I felt like the more we talked and laughed we were being observed. No one knew we were friends that haven't seen one another in a very long time and always enjoyed being around one another.

Little Victoria (approx. age 7)

Growing up light skin:
My family has all skin tones, my beautiful family is black. We're made up of different ethnic backgrounds, but our birthcertificates say African-American. Growing up my grandfather looked white, he was biracial. His mother Black and father white, he was raised by the orphanage Boystown. His blue eyes and foul language, people assumed he was Italian. My mother can tell you growing up black, with a daddy that appeared white was probably  even more difficult. She said, "I'd  duck down in the car or have my dad drop me off further away from the school, so the kids wouldn't tease me about  having a white dad".  Black kids can be vicious, I remember  biracial twins Sam and Mike from preschool would tease me and harass me to admit I was mixed. They would refuse to believe my dad was black and from East Saint Louis and my mom was black and from Little Rock, Arkansas.
Growing up I've heard it all. I even think I listen to more hip hop to compensate for not being black enough. I honestly love all genres but unconsciously knowing, I listen to music that I think everyone else listens to ...while being Black.

My daughter is also very light and she has the same name as her cousin but it is spelled differently. These two are different complextions and when they were younger the kids would call them the Black one and the white one. Luckily another kid stepped in and changed that, now they are used their initials to identify the one they want.

Being light skin:
It's one of those things, I appreciate. I can't change it. I don't think I'm better than anyone. It's obvious that others pay attention to the color of their skin. Being Black is already difficult without other Blacks comparing ourselves to one another. I'm still Black and this Black is beautiful. My birthcertificate doesn't say, "yella", "redbone", or "highlighter". No matter who I date, I'm Black. Even if it's a "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" moment or step in the room with my beautiful family members Jackie, Natalie, Bonita or Carmen; I'm going to be the butt of someone's joke. It never fails, but like I said, "I'm still Black and this Black is beautiful.

Nobody understood what it was like to be black and Jewish… being different from everyone else just made me a lot stronger.” – Drake

Whitney

To begin, Bobby looked like Bobby. Yes, Yaya was on point as Whitney. But if it really started like that, good girl/bad boy fever... I find it hard to believe. Now don't get me wrong, Bobby as and asshole I believe. Thank you, Deborah Cox on vocals. Yes! Love that! Needed a voice close enough to believe. They also had enough sex in this movie to take those scenes out to make the Bobby and Whitney Sextape. Yes, if technology was like it is now. They would  have crushed Kim and Ray J!
The fact they didn't make Bobby the reason why she was on drugs, made it as if the story is really being told. So, many times I looked and thought it was the late and great Whitney Houston in several scenes. This was a spin though, Bobby not into drugs?? Hard to believe... then again.
**Oh! And Hilarious! Eddie Murphy wasn't interested in Whitney. Think about it.**
Bobby and Whitney having epic sex? Believable, had to be great sex for her to say he was the King of R&B! Really?
Damn, Whitney as a mack and Bobby feeling like the woman... hmm new twist. It's again, believable. Just because of how hard they went and  once they took it to that next level. She loved hard, I could see that being her biggest fear. Whitney definitely seemed like the "if I'm loving you, we're going to stay in love" type. A lot like me, Whitney wasn't down with being embarrassed or the embarrassment. To add to the story that wasn't mentioned, was Bobby her rebound from her previous relationship she had with the then football star Randall Cunningham?**Sparkle being her favorite movie and she ironically played the mother on the new version of the remake. Deep**
Now, Bobby being a player? Believable. Seeing Bobby as a good guy versus how the media portrayed him in that time, it's believable. Cissy in an interview with Oprah admitted to Whitney being exposed to drugs before Bobby. Whitney's brother confessed to being her dealer. Bobby got involved in his mess, but much like Whitney there is always a source the time problem.
Clive as the puppeteer... I believe. He hit an insecurity in Bobby. It made him the title of Mr.Whitney Houston, his ego couldn't handle. Love in that type of industry can be difficult. At a point a man has to be the assistant, to a situation  he entered as her equal. Yes, I believe  that's the point where any relationship takes it downhill for the worse.
**Now, no I've never done cocaine and I won't but if she was able to function like that until that one time we all remember and she couldn't hit that note?...  not half bad.**
After watching the entire movie, the full circle was made. These two needed help and it seems like Whitney was willing to admit her wrongs. Again, being accountable and being an embarassment wasnt her thing, based off her relationship with her mother Cissy.
The entire story of their (Whitney and Bobby) destruction and Whitney's self-destruction that led to her own demise. I personally didn't need to see the Whitney I saw glempses of in tabloids of her and Bobby at their worst. This showed me, honestly my all time favorite singer as a human. She was placed on such a pedistal, we as her fans couldn't believe anything was wrong with her. She's Whitney  and she fell in love. "Sometimes you love someone so hard, you don't realize you're  loving them wrong" -Bobby Brown. Much like Chris Brown, sometimes the one you love isn't the best for you. Sometimes that love can be what hurts you the most.

Sleeping Beauty getting coffee with Bill Cosby

Art Streiber/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Image

I've shared my opinion about Bill Cosby and he's old, but really? Sunday, January 11th; Amy Poehler and Tina Fey hosted the 70th Annual Golden Globes...Again.

Amy and Tina are talk about several movies and actors. The continue to talk about Into The Woods and Amy says, "Cinderella looses a glass slipper... and Sleeping Beauty thought she was having coffee with Bill Cosby". Now, would a joke regarding 7th Heaven Dad, Stephan Collins on his admitted child molestation been that funny? I guess both are crimes, but it's easier to laugh at someone that got women over the age of 18. Is it that Bill Cosby was funny because the crime was developed from 30 year old allegations of women that came for Bill Cosby right as he was making moves to have television bringing back Black Americans back and better than what's being shown today.
Don't get me wrong, I like Tina and Amy, but I feel like the writers of the Golden Globes were trying to get ratings for a show that I only look at the celebrities the day after to whose stylist loved or hated them. The show is more like prom, you get dolled and socialize to be seen. Honestly anyone that is familiar with the show, you'd know that it's mainly a political game on the shows awarded.
Let's think, GoldenGlobes only gave Selma 1 award and they were without a doubt snubbed in major categories. I know half of those movies that won that night, I've never seen. Like every year, the movies I'm rooting for due to their great performances and my love for the talented actors that grace the screen and inspire many like myself... Never win. If they do, their a gangster or slut; either way The Oscars and Golden Globes have proven time and time again what they think about black faces on the big screen deserve.

"Everybody talks and everybody listen/But somehow the truth just always comes up missing."
-Drake (Say What's Real)

Living Single 2015

It was cool "Living Single" when it was a 90s kind of world but I was a kid then too. As a twenty something young female you question yourself, what am I doing wrong? Why am I single? Every week looking on Instagram and there's a post saying something like, "If she's pretty and single, she's crazy". Then you question yourself, "am I?". Is it that I'm possibly crazy and drive dudes away? Am I to pushy? Is it because my ass doesn't look like Nicki? Do I have too many rules? Do I not have enough rules? Am I expressing too much? Is it because I don't have the perfect body?
Then hopefully you laugh at yourself and say "No, I'm damn near perfect", because you are. If anything, if a guy can't see that you're independent, but you know when to let a man be a man if he shows he's capable, then honey you're damn near perfect. I can't tell you how many " I hate I didn't do you right" text that I receive. It's like guys have an epiphany, deal with a chick that doesn't do half of what you did for him, or  just flat out realizes he did you dirty and wants forgiveness. Is it fair to you to doubt who you are? If he can't take you at your Regine, Max, Khadijah, and or Sinclair (No Overton), then maybe he's not the one you end the up with in the series finale.
Guys, are constantly making post like, "The best pu**y, is loyal pu**y", but their penis is more involved in the community than the Mayor. That is the moment, women see double standards are what block relationships. When a woman decides to invest in her own Trojans and feel no attachment much like Maxine Shaw, she is labeled a hoe, a bitch, a slut anything other than the strong minded woman she chose to be. She can't allow a man to not show commitment when she does and remain ok in the situation because it isn't a relationship, it's self-destruction.
For the full cast of Living Single, kind of woman, meaning a young lady that can hold down the household, get her needs satisfied, and enter a room to effortlessly get all the attention; a man can't handle. Seems like the more a woman proves she can be warm by herself, the opposite sex find it hard to control. I personally have dealt with an individual that adored my qualifications as a woman but didn't want me to have the mentality to match. He made it apart of his everyday life to place me on a pedestal that only he could congratulate me on but knock me off  too. He created my dependency on him. I believe it's one reasons I'm single, I don't really think I'm as beautiful as I've been told. Honestly, I look in the mirror and try to convince myself  the confidence I portray to those looking at me. I told myself I'd express that detail more, in hopes that I'd force myself out of that thought process.
As you continue your ongoing episode of Living Single I hope you figure out your strengths and weaknesses; note them. Some say find God, but depending on your beliefs I just say find the God within and know there is a higher power. Then you can proceed to walk that walk. Know you're damn  near perfect and that girl all the guys make googly eyes over, just think she was once an ugly duckling that spent all her money on that body, hair, and nails and she was born a boy (😂 even if she wasn't a boy, it still makes you laugh).

"You ain't the only one that's try a be the only one."
-Drake (We'll Be Fine)

Empire VS black•ish; Thanks to their networks

As we enter 2015, the faces of Black Americans on TV are faced with another dilemma. Thanks to FOX  and ABC, that air 2 shows. These shows deliver Black Americans in power and delivering 2 different messages of the black culture but we are having to choose seeing that that ar aired at the same time. Why?          
We have on the Fox network, Empire;  which premiered January  2015. The premiere gave you drama at rapid speed. Jail, drug money, and foul language all in one. Once upon a time lovers Lucios and Cookie; played by Terrance Howard and Taraji P. Henson. Entering the room with a fierce attitude, Cookie enters for the   takeover of what she's owed from the record company that was built from the drug money that caused her to serve 17 years in jail.
In only a few words, she can slash you effortlessly with her tongue. The episode continues with showing a divide in their family as Lucios has moved on while Cookie reside in jail after taking the heat for him. Their son's  Andre (dating a white girl) , Jamal (homosexual), and Hakeem (lost).
Then we switch to ABC where the show Blackish is on and originally  premiered September 2014. Blackish is showing you a strong black family, man and wife played by Anthony Anderson and Tracee Ellis Ross. Their characters Dre and Rainbow are raising a beautiful  family of 4 kids; Zoey, Dre Jr., and twins Jack and Diane. Now for those that have never seen Blackish. Dre and Rainbow have great careers and a solid household in the suburbs that face contentious battles of trying to raise their black family in the burbs.
As you see Empire and Blackish, 2 black families of different  backgrounds, but they compete for our views. Why is that FOX and ABC? Two shows that could change the view of Black Americans on television. We have to compete for good tv, why? Too much power for the African Americans on tv?
I want these shows both to succeed. Afterall it's refreshing to see black women posed as other than Housewives that are BARELY housewives and Love and Hip Hop of BARELY known artist that are never in love and Sorority  Sisters that BARELY do work in their organization. **I'M BLIND  THOUGH**
I truly hate that we have to be put in a position  to chase our faces on television, especially when we haven't seen good television since Martin, Living Single, A Different World, Fresh Prince, and    Hanging  With Mr. Cooper, and The Cosby show (Yes, regardless).